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Cheryl is today easier?

Discussion in 'Dogs - all breeds / types' started by Mary_NH, Oct 24, 2005.

  1. Mary_NH

    Mary_NH New Member

    I had a few moments today too.
    After dinner we had a bit of pork left over and I found myself picking it up intending to drop it into Sadie's food dish.
    I did a rabies clinic at the shelter today (wrote up slips) and saw a dog I was interested in (still too soon though) when the lady at the shelter was telling me about their policy I started to say I'd have to bring Sadie down to make sure she got along with the dog. Couldn't believe I said that!!!!
    It's taking awhile isn't it?
    I don't want to forget Sadie....I'd like to get used to her not being here, but then again I fear that when I do I'll forget her.
     
  2. Jamiya

    Jamiya New Member

    You will never forget, Mary.
     
  3. honeybears

    honeybears New Member

    Oh Mary, I am so sorry to hear about Sadie, she gave you many happy years,

    honeybear
     
  4. Cheryl

    Cheryl New Member

    I know what you mean Mary...

    The day after Tiffany died, I sat at my computer and printed out pictures of her to put everywhere and typed up a long list of the beautiful wonderful things that I want to always remember about her.

    Like how she could arrange that squeaky right between her front paws, then launch it straight at me with her nose... Her aim was good. And how every time I looked down, there was that beautiful little face looking up at me.

    Everytime I eat there is an empty space at my feet... She always watched me avidly while I ate... I still have one dog left - so he's going to gain a little weight for awhile, as I still find myself putting a couple pieces for each dog, off to the side while I eat - so I can give it to them at the end of the meal. I hope god gives her a piece of steak now then. Then I picture her "washing" her face on God's cloak... She always found the nearest cloth covered surface right after eating.

    I manage my parents hotel, and Tiffany came to work with me every day.
    I know I will have many teary moments ahead as each of the guest's who knew her ask where she is.

    I have no doubt that it was time for her to go... (never thought I would actually pray for the end - she couldn't breath well) And I know we had a great 13 years together...

    I sent Tiffany this morning to a crematorium, as I was unable to make myself do everything that would be required to bury her in October in the Yukon... (thawing the ground before digging, etc... I am also getting divorced, so my ex is not around to help this time ) Then I can bury her next summer, or sprinkle her where she loved to walk or keep her.

    A couple days back I was in a hurry to get a new puppy... Now I'm not so sure... Guess I should take my time a bit... The next dog that is meant for me will arrive somehow.

    Hopin' it gets better for both of us...
     
  5. Mary_NH

    Mary_NH New Member

    my mornings have been rough. For years, after my husband and son left for the day (work and school), it's been me with my pets and our morning routine. I'm finding I automatically reach into Sadie's treat jar.
    I also had Sadie cremated and she'll be placed with my other Bridge pets in their little garden area.
    With my others I took a picture of them and wrote the name along with birthdate and date of passing. I then wrap the photo up in plastic and place in the tin the ashes are in.
    My first dog we kept her ashes in the house for nearly a year before we could place them in the ground.
    I have a friend who did a drawing of Sadie a few months ago - my son is having it matted and framed for me for Christmas. It'll get a spot of honor in the house
     
  6. Cheryl

    Cheryl New Member

    The worst part...

    Sometimes I swear I hear that little tiny sound Tiffany made when she was trying to get my attention... I turn around and look for her...

    It was refined to such a small sound in later years, but it didn't matter how much noise was around... I would hear it...

    All Day - It's like I'm forgetting to do something usual...

    What's the statute of limitations on whining to everyone about this...?

    :m13:
     
  7. honeybears

    honeybears New Member

    "What's the statute of limitations on whining to everyone about this...?"

    thats why we hare here. :)

    you know its been over 2 months since I lost Midas and every once in awhile I swear I hear him meow
     
  8. Mary_NH

    Mary_NH New Member

    it is quite a comfort to know there is someplace to go where people fully understand w/out hesitation how it feels to lose such a large part of one's life.
    A beloved cherished pet becomes such a part of one's life/daily routines that we do sometimes take it for granted that they are there. Then the years pass and one day the pet is gone...then we, perhaps, had taken a little more time to "smell the roses" so to speak.
    When was the last time I hugged Sadie?
    When was the last time I took her for a short walk she so enjoyed?
    My son keeps telling me the last time he spoke to Sadie he yelled at her to get out of the garbage - he regrets that now. Although the next morning when he left for school he reached down and gave her a pet and said he didn't mean to yell so loudly.
    But to have someplace to go to talk about our deceased pets and know people have been there, understand how we feel is so important.
    I had a guy come into my office yesterday wondering why I hadn't gotten his new listing on our brochure (real estate office) i explained to him that Friday afternoon I didn't go back to work after having to unexpectedly have my dog PTS. His reaction...did you cry? You over it now? I wanted to grab the goatlicker by the neck and shaked him until he cried. I ignored him. But my first thought was....I'm glad there are people out there that truly understand how I feel.
     
  9. Cheryl

    Cheryl New Member

    I guess I am lucky in that I kinda knew it was a "possibility" that Tiffany could bottom out quickly from her heart murmur... The vet said some bottom out quick... Some can last a couple years on the pills...

    Tiffany also had a collapsing Trachea, and that was bothering her more and more... So I purposely did the walks and hugging alot in the last few months...

    And especially in the last month... My mother was in the hospital for colon cancer and I had time off to help her... You folks down south probably don't have such liberal hospitals... I will send a card to the hospital where Mom was to thank them for letting me bring Tiffany up to my mothers room - several times each day... She got alot of loving and petting from us and other patients.

    Otherwise I would have had great regrets... Because if that hospital wouldn't have let her come in... she would have spent most of her days alone downstairs in the camper...

    Day by day - it gets a little better...
     
  10. Dukesdad

    Dukesdad New Member

    It took me a few days to joing this thread because I do still miss my old man Jake and it's been over three years.

    For Cheryl who wrote:
    Read my last tribute to Jake where I tell how Duke "found us" in "Jake's Last Gift". Your next dog, I am sure, will find you like Duke found me.
    Here is the link to Jake's page. You will find it interesting.
    http://home.flash.net/~jdebess/index.htm
     

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