Dear Dog and Cat attention please

When I say move, it means go someplace else, not switch positions with each other so there are still two of you in the way.
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. (Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate & food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food & dish, nor do I find the aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.)
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the objective> Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anyhting bigger than a king size bed. I am sorry about this. Do not think I will continue to sleep on the couch to ensure your comfort.
Look at videos of dogs and cats sleeping. They can actually curl up in a ball. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. (I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space used is nothing but sarcasm.)
My compact discs are not miniature frisbees.
For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob, or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. (In addtion, I have been using the bathroom for years...canine or feline attendance is not mandatory.)
The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dogs or cats butt.l
I cannot stress this enough. It would be such a simple change for you.

RULES FOR NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:

1. They live here; you don't.
2. If you don't was their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.
3. I like my pet better than I like most people.
4. To you it's an animal. To me he and/or she is an adopted son and/or daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and is speech challenged.
5. Dogs and cats are better than kids. They eat less, don't ask for money all the time, are easier to train, usually come when called, never drive your car, don't hang out with drug using friends, don't drink or smoke, don't worry about buying the latest fashions, don't wear your clothes, don't need a gazillion dollars for college.


Now this is very true in my house. I don't know about the rest of you folks but I have this posted on front and back door, especially to those visting my menagerie.

 

:0023: How very true!

 

You said it! :m39: :mrgreen: :lol:

 

:m39: I love it! Thanks for sharing

 

Yay! That's great and very true!

 

omg this is soo true..all 3 of my furbabies need to be in there w/ me...or i must see paws under the door and hear incessant meowing..like i ran away..lol..those are great!!

 

That was great!
LOL rcrgal. That part especially cracked me up as I go through that with mine almost everyday. :mrgreen:

 

bathroom attendance by pets

In my case it is not just the cats but I have 10 Min Pins and without fail they also have the same need for some reason to be in attendance.