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Didn't get to say goodbye.

Discussion in 'Cats - all breeds / types' started by darkrabbit213, Mar 18, 2005.

  1. darkrabbit213

    darkrabbit213 New Member

    So, after all the fighting Patrick and I have done (for those of you who know me) to keep our little furbabies and to live on our own the unthinkable finally happened. We had no money and nowhere to go. I ended up having to drop out of school and get a full time job at Dunkin' Donuts and we had to move in with my mom.
    We recently finally got a place, and my mother agreed to let my babies stay at her house for a couple days while we got settled.... when we went back to get them, they were gone. She had taken Bruce, Blaze, Donut and Lone Wolf to the animal shelter and Sherbert to get fixed etc. and is keeping him. When Patrick and I found out what had happened we went to the shelter, with pictures of us with the kittens as proof they were ours. Since we're minor they couldn't give them to us, and it's $60 per cat adoption fee even if we had someone get them for us.
    To make matters worse we couldn't even see them because they had been taken to the vet for spaying/shots. They told us to come back in a week.
    Well... we went there today to find out that they had all been renamed and were now Chrissy, Holly, Myra and Tina... which completely broke my heart it was like they had just thrown away who they were... and then they told me that Chrissy (who I found out was my Bruce) had been adopted... now I will never even get to say good by toher. And then they told me that Holly, Myra and Tina were in isolation because they had become "critically ill". They had never once been sick in my care, and that was BEFORE their shots. They told me I wouldn't be able to see them and that they didn't know when they would be out of isolation. I'm so depressed that I feel sick... they had never been sick before and they were always cheerful... and their names are changed and everything. I don't know what to do with myself... I thought atleast I'd be a little happy knowing they had homes even if they were in the shelter.. but... not three of them are sick? I don't know what to do with myself right now...

    I just thought I would share with everybody what became of myself the my babies...
     
  2. nern

    nern New Member

    I'm so sorry to hear this. I can understand how upset you must be. Hopefully, the three sick kittens will get well and find loving homes. Is the shelter going to keep you informed on what happens with them?
    {{{Hugs}}}
     
  3. DeLaUK

    DeLaUK New Member

    Im fairly new to this board and so I dont know you but I just thought I would let you know that while sometimes there are no words that can take your pain away there are people who know how you feel right now and are thinking about you and your kitties.
     
  4. halaroo

    halaroo New Member

    I'm sorry... I hope you get everything back together again soon. Take care of yourself!
     
  5. Mary_NH

    Mary_NH New Member

    I'm sorry Rabbit....I hope the kittens didn't get sick at the shelter, which is a strong possibility. I'm sure it was nothing that happened while you had them. At least you'll know where one is - with your mother.
    The only upside to this is you don't have to add the burden of their care to the confusion of your young life. You have so much on your plate that I feel for you (I'd hug you if I could)....now you don't have to worry about them, where to find money to get food and vet care for the kittens - you can concentrate on your life and get a kitten of your own later when you are financially stable.
    I always worried that if any of your kittens got really ill if you'd be able to pay for possibly high vet bills - that is always a concern.
    I remember I got a kitten when I was a young single parent and she was very sickly - money I spent on her vet care I could have used to buy food for my son....I ended up moving back home, with my son and kitten. Hated doing it too.
    It sucks...but you really need to concentrate on your life and get your butt back in school!!!!!!
     
  6. faeriedust1127

    faeriedust1127 New Member

    Its very sad that your mother did that without telling you first. but i agree with Mary_NH. 5 kittens is a lot of responsibility that you dont need when you are struggling with your life situation and no means of financial stability. I'm not sure what the story is with you and your mom and why you want to move away from her so bad, but if the situation is just something like she annoys you and you would rather live with your BF, then i would consider toughing it out at home at least until you finish school. (im assuming you mean HS, not sure how old you are) So many jobs won't even hire you without a diploma and you will never make any decent money without it. I was going to suggest to you to do an online search for getting a job with your county which usually pays better than just working in a retail store or look for a job that offers benefits. Some grocery stores and big chains like Petsmart do, but its really more important to finish HS before any of that. I'm sort of going through a sticky situation myself right now as i'm getting a divorce and i'm staying at dad's right now, but he is selling his house. I wasn't working while i was married, just going to college, but now i have to get a fulltime job to get ready for some big changes in my life. I also have an excess of animals and have to make some difficult decisions about them. I never planned on getting divorced and being in this situation, but now being the sole provider for 7 rats, 1 mouse, a hermit crab and a cat is suddenly a huge concern for me with everything going on in my life right now and all the moving i'm gonna have to be doing over the next year. I'm seriously contemplating only keeping my cat, allowing my 3 older rats to die off and rehoming my other pets. Its so hard to look at them and imagine them being cared for by someone else, but ultimately you have to put yourself first and think way ahead to how adding to your hardships will affect you.
     
  7. sunset05

    sunset05 New Member

    That is so sad. I'm sorry you have to go through all of this. I hope the kitties get well. I really don't have any advice. Just hope everything will turn out alright for you. Hang in there. I'll keep you in my prayers.
     
  8. vene

    vene New Member

    Bunny, my heart goes out to you. *HUGS* I sure hope the little ones will recover soon and find good homes.
     
  9. Cassie

    Cassie New Member

    darkrabbit, I agree 2000% with Mary's post. You fell upon hard times, and I think the kitties got their illnesses at the shelter but know that they will be cared for and adopted out. I understand your anger and pain but the best thing you can do is better yourself...get to school and a few short years, you can house as many kitties as you want.

    I was worried about you, missed ya. Thanks for the update hun. ::hugs::
     
  10. Bente

    Bente New Member

    I'm so sorry rabbit :cry: :cry: I can't even imagine the pain you must be in now... My heart goes out to you, I felt like crying when I read your post. If someone just gave Kyrre away, with or without my knowledge, I don't know what I would do!
    Will you still be visiting Sherbert? I can imagine you are not too happy with your mom now, or what? I got to say i don't think it was very fair of her to give them away like that without even talking to you about it... Like the others said, you now have less financial worries, but that must feel like a bittersweet benefit for you now... (or maybe just bitter yet) I hope you'll still be poping by from time to time, we've missed you!

    *A million hugs from me*
     
  11. luna

    luna New Member

    your mom had no right to do what she did seeing as they arn't her cats. you should take Sherbert from her and if she makes a fuss tell her that Sherbert is yourse no matter what she says. and maybe you could ask the shelter to keep your cats untill you can get them from the shelter with your pictures, offer to buy their food and other stuff. hope you get them back.
     
  12. lucidity03

    lucidity03 New Member

    I'm so sorry to hear all of this. I can't imagine the heartbreak it caused. I'm sure it isn't any easier even though it may lighten up your financial burden, etc. Those were your babies that you got attached to.

    It's too bad that your mother didn't address the problem with you so you guys could come to a solution. I don't think it was right for her to do that behind your back, even if she did it in your best interest. She should've told you.

    Either way, I'm sorry and I hope things get better for you.
     
  13. kyles101

    kyles101 New Member

    that would be a really immature thing to do luna. darkrabbits mum has every right to do whatever she likes. she is the mum, darkrabbit is the child. my mum would do exactly the same if i were in that situation.
     
  14. Bente

    Bente New Member

    I'm not sure if I agree with you on that Kyles. Offcourse the child should always listen to the parent, but I think it was very immature of Rabbit's mom not to adress the problem with Rabbit before she did something so drastic like giving the kittens away.
    The kittens belonged to Darkrabbit and were only living in the mom's house temporary (sp?), and in my opinion the mom had no right what so ever to give the kittens away.
    The situation would have been different if Rabbit and the kittens were living with the mom on a permanent basis...

    I don't know what relationship Rabbit and her mother has, and what reason her mother had for giving the kittens away, but it all sounds very disrespectful to me. Some may argue and say that it is in the best interest for both Rabbit and the kittens, but I don't think the possible financial stability (sp?) she gains from this adds up for the loss of he kittens. And it must be especially painfull for Rabbit since she didn't get to be a part of the decision making and to say goodbye to her babies...

    I'm sorry if I'm getting a little carried away here, this is not ment as an attac on other peoples opinions. I just feel so sorry for Rabbit...
     
  15. kyles101

    kyles101 New Member

    sorry but none of us have the right to undermine darkrabbits mum, especially when you have never met her. if she addressed the problem what do you think darkrabbit would do? there would be no reasoning, just a bunch of yelling and screaming by the sounds of it. like you said, you dont know what kind of relationship they have, nor do you know what kind of person darkrabbit is anyway. so lets not jump to conclusions and label her mum the bad guy. its sad, but we are in no place to take sides.
     
  16. darkrabbit213

    darkrabbit213 New Member

    my mother and i never established any kind of relationship throughout any of my life. she was never around and i only lived with her for a short while. i grew up with my grandmother and aunt mostly. my mother has played no part in any of my life. as for my father my parents are divorced and i have only met him twice. to make matters even more clear my mother had every choice and opportunity to be part of my life and never was. i didn't realize telling people about my kittens who i'd been raising for 6 months and had everything they needed would bring up such controversy about my mother, who i've never even spoken about until this post.

    ...forget it! there's no use for me sticking up for myself against kylie! i'm so bored out it...

    but thanks everyone else for the support, that's what i was looking for, everyone needs support when they're depressed... and this is a great place to find it. :)
     
  17. kyles101

    kyles101 New Member

    rabbit, dont even bother making me out to be the bad guy. its got nothing to do with 'standing up for yourself' and who you think is right or wrong. its about proper use of the boards and respect for others. i think its sad you lost the kittens but if you have issues with your mum keep it to yourself. you lost your kittens and thats all you needed to say. you elaborated and have given people an opportunity to pass judgement on someone who they dont know and who doesnt have the ability to tell her side of the story. the people on this board who have passed judgement should know better. you wouldnt like your kids talking about you behind your back to a bunch of strangers, then having those strangers talk about you. [-X rabbit, people are here for sympathy and comfort, not as soldiers in your family feud.
     
  18. DeLaUK

    DeLaUK New Member

    We all need to vent sometimes and the best thing to do when your depressed and need support is to reach out for it, keeping it inside is never a good thing.

    Please keep us posted on the kitties if you can Rabbit, I know the fact that they changed their names upset you because it seemed as though they were throwing away their past but Ive changed a few pets names myself with some of the pets Ive taken in, not to throw away or disrespect their past but to start a new life, another life, choosing a name for a pet is all part of the bonding process, there was something about each kitten that made you pick particular names for them and I imagine when they are adopted the new faimly may change their name again, try not to think of it as a bad thing.
     
  19. luna

    luna New Member

    kyles101, how would you like it if your mom gave your pets to the shelter with out telling you and keeping one for herself? you'd change your tune if it was your cats.think about it and then say what you would do instead of what people should do.
     
  20. lil96

    lil96 New Member

    Once when I was about 15 or 16 my mom did give away my kitten, I was extrememly upset. I eventually went bak to the house and they gave me another kitten, as mine had already been given to someone else.
    And once I came home, 2 months after my dad had remariied and his new wife decided her kids and the churchs yard sale needed all my stuff and so she gave it all away. I know what it is like to lose stuff. It is really sad.
    But I was living in my parents house the first time when I was a kid, and the second, my stuff was being temporarily stored there in their house.
    On a side note, the humane society here once told me if you have a cat in yourposssession for more than 2 weeks, it is yours, even if someone left it there for you to watch and said they were coming back for it. (I'm not sure how long they were at your moms house)
    But ok, sad enough reality checks: Your mom wouldn't take care of you as you are (and still are) a child, why would she take care of kittens? She sounds very irresponsible to me.
    You needyour Hgh School Education desperately, live in a shelter get assistance, suck it up and go into foster care until you are 18, do anything to avoid working at a Duncan Donuts for the rest of yourlife you can do so much more with a High SChool diploma. And I know this sounds cruel, but I am glad yuor mom gave them away, you have no right to have so many cats, you are a child, no matter if you are pretending to be an adult. I am sorry if I sound so mean. I had a terrible childhood too, i know what it is like, but I stuck through and finished HS and then went on to college, with no assistance from my family at all. You can do it too!! DON'T let yourself be sucked down, you are a strong loving person and you will make it, if you push yourself and stay in school.
     

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