My Stress Story - just need to rant a little

This is totally not dog related but you all seem to be good at making others feel better about their stressful situations so I'm going to post in search of a little comfort. While my current situation pales in comparison to some of the others I have heard, it is still quite unnerving to me.

Well...I am currently getting my master's in accounting and right now I am going through recruiting at my college. I don't graduate until May but apparently you start these things early. Too early in my opinion. But anyways, next week I have 4 interviews. 3 of which are really important, they are 3 firms that I am really considering. The 4th is just a backup I guess.

My first interview is at 9 am on Tuesday. I have 2 on tuesday and then another 2 on Thursday. I'm freaking out already. I am not good with interviews. I am not necessarily good with talking period. I am just naturally a very quiet person. I also happen to be very, very, very shy. I had a dinner tonight with one of the firms. It was not fun. I am just horrendous at small talk. You cannot learn small talk. I just suck at it. Unless I'm talking about my dogs (the only subject I can go on and on about), I have nothing to say. I'm quite sure the partners of the big accounting firms do not want to hear what Indiana ate today.

The first interview is with a big firm, Grant Thornton. 6th largest acctg firm in the US. I am freaking out b/c they are the main one I want. The interview is 45 mins long. How in god's name am I supposed to talk for 45 mins?????????? I have no idea.

I have no, or relatively no job experience. I am a school nerd. I get excellent grades (my saving grace in all of this), graduated magna cum laude, etc. Socially, I am a retard. It is just not my thing. I can crunch numbers, perform audit tests, etc. all day long, but get me in a conversation and that is the end of me. When I get nervous, I can't talk. Literally, I can't talk. Then I start stuttering, and nothing comes out right.

? I just don't know what to do. I am going to try to do a mock interview this Friday if I can get a time. But even the thought of that makes me want to throw up. This is all just a rant. I'm jacked up to no end. I'm not going to get any sleep for the next week. Week and one day. By like 1 pm Thursday next week, I'll be in heaven I guess. But then even after that and for hypothetical purposes only, I do well on the interview, there is a second interview and office visits. ?????

Is there some trick to talking to people that I just don't know?????? It just blows my mind. How do people talk to people they don't know?

Ok. That is my rant. I've been searching the web for advice but can't find much useful advice except to practice interviewing. Guess I'll be doing that all weekend. I'm gonna write out all the answers so I'll have some chance. Ok. Now I'm done.

 

First of all, Just relax. Thinking in your head that this is the most important interview of your life, that you really want this job, etc., is only going to cause you to put more pressure on yourself and be more nervous. Just think to yourself that if you don't get this job, that it is not the end of the world, that there are always other jobs, etc-- it will take the pressure off somewhat. Second, what always helps me is to remember that the people interviewing me, though they may seem intimidating and larger than life, are just normal like me. I try to imagine how many kids they have, if they have any pets, etc- I try to think of them at home, eating dinner with their family or watching tv or something, and it helps me to realize that they're just like me, and for some reason this helps. Thirdly, just be yourself, and Have confidence- even if you have doubts, you have to convince yourself that you are perfect for this job, and to me, it sounds like you are perfect for it- I mean, you're extremely smart and great with numbers- what more could an accounting firm ask for? It's important to be yourself too, because if you try to be someone you're not, it will be obvious to an interviewer. At the same time though, remember to be confident, and focus on all your positive attributes when answering interview questions. Hope this helps! I do a lot of human resource stuff in my job, and plus I'm a grad student seeking a better job right now too, so I feel your pain!! Good luck on all your interviews!

 

Wow, Eliza....I'm really sorry that you're so stressed {{Hugs}}....I can understand how you must feel because I am exactly the same as you described yourself above. I don't have any advice but just wanted to wish you luck at your interviews. :wink:

 

First of all ..RELAX ,take a hot bubble bath ,drink a glass of wine and stop thinking for a few minutes ...Not kidden here ...
Create some down time before the interviews ,relaxing candlelight and wine (not too mch ) ...baths instead of showers ....more relaxing ,all will come to you in time ...
You have done a great job of talking here ,in long letters and in your thoughts and inspirations ,now put that same energy into your interviews ...
You know what you have to say ,have to feel and ask as many questions as they do ...make a list ...while you are relaxing ,if a thought enters your head ,jot it down and then each time before the interview ,read your thougts ,correct the mistakes and bangh....you got it ..
main thing is not to feel below your own expectations ...get out there with the head high ,the mouth working and feeling good about it ...it works ...it truly does work ..

 

I am the same as you are, very shy and nervious about talking with people, never really knowing what to talk about.
I always hated talking to new people but that was part of my first job.
And you just have to think that (like the others said), these people are just like you. Don't make yourself extra nervious about what they might be thinking or if you are talking enough. Just be yourself and even though the interview is about work, maybe ...hopefully you will have a friendly interviewer and they will mention something that maybe ya'll have in common (other than work) and that would be great!
Mainly you just have to get your mind set that they are no better than you. You deserve this job and you will be good.. or great at it.

And like ilovemaltipoos said, make a list. Think of as many questions as possible .. that when when things get quiet you will have another question. Don't worry! With 4 interviews, You KNOW you are going to get one.. being as good as you are ... AND being confident in yourself and work. Thats very important! ... Just think of it as you talking with your best friend about work and how much you want the job, what you can do and what you want/need to know about the job. Oh, and you might want to type them up and maybe put it in a folder or clipboard... professional like. Let them know you are ready. ???

When I first started working at my second job (this one) I was terrified of my boss. She was so intimidating (sp?) and it was like being on pins and needles whenever she was here. After about a year, I realized that she is just like anybody else and she worrys about the same things that we worry about. I mean, she was trying to get a customer and was worried that sitting behind her huge desk might be too intimidating and she didn't want the customer to think she was 'above' him. See.. they are only human.

And of course you know... clean nails, nice hair, no flashy earings, nice suit, no figiting, nice firm handshake, sit when asked, and nice breath! LOL! oh and dont put your head down ...be confident

(This was one thing they taught in high school buisness class lol)

Goodluck, we all know you can do this. Don't stress over it, you will be fine!

Be sure to let us know which job you get. :wink:


:m18:

 

Sit across from them and pretend they're in their underwear and have food on their face!!!!! Not really.

Remember that they're not hiring you for your social abilities, but for your accounting abilities. Typically people that are shy are very nice people - not overbearing. Overbearing is a terrible quality in an interview, or employee/co-worker (they're not going to be looking for a person who can run everyones job and/or life, but to have a person who is qualified and will be productive). So you should do great! Just relax and be yourself. From your writing, it sounds like you should have no problem expressing yourself. Don't be so hard on yourself!!!!! Try to get them to talk about themselves (not too much, this should stay more job related) and tell you about the company (how many locations/employees; accounting specifics; type of clientelle; etc.) . Ask questions if you don't know what to talk about. Simply let them know you are interested in the company and the job, but keep it sincere.

As far as small talk - you would be surprised how much the other people would be interested in little things you have to say. Most of them have either children, pets, hobbies, etc. And, most people like to hear something about what your expreriences are too, just don't dwell on yourself. Generally speaking, people like to talk about themselves. Ask questions and be a good listener; that usually keeps the conversation going.

You will do just fine. Good luck.

 

This interview book landed me my current position: 101 Great Answers to the Toughest Interview Questions, by Ron Fry (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/t..._books_3/002-4342618-3343261?v=glance&s=books)

Then pratice, practice, practice! The more you practice, the more likely it is for answers to roll off your tongue automatically so you don't have to sit there trying to think what to say and panicking.

 

I love to talk, so thats really never been a problem for me. Other than Granvel telling me to Shut up! Just think to your self while they ask you questions, I'm accepting them, they aren't accepting me!!! Put yourself as teh boss, and the confidence that follows will blow you away!!! Act as if nothing is better than you (in your head) You've been doing this your WHOLE life, nothing diffrent here.

Get infront of a mirror, practice!!! I know ist unnerving talkingtoyourself in the mirror, so it should be a peice of cake talking to them!!!

Oh and the underwear thing, it'll only make you laugh!!! Trust me I know.....(long story)

 

You sound alot like my fi. He is always complaining he can't talk to people, he would rather chew his own arm off than talk to someone he doesn'T know. Except he also thinks the people hate him(which no one does) It is just something I think you need to figure out. No matter how many times we tell you calm down relax, no big deal.... etc. It won't change, you need to consciously make that change for yourself, because no one else matters more to yourself than you, honestly. You need to be strong and carry on a conversation for you and know that you are doing it for you and it will make you so strong and really appreciate how great you are. I hope this all makes sense. It is hard to type bc Iwant to tell you 1,000,000,000 things but they are going through my head to quick. But have faith in yourself and your faith will lead you where you should be.

 

Eliza, I am the same way, I freeze when I have to talk to people in person. I went through an accellerated college program where each class was 5 weeks, and every one of them for 4 years we had to talk in in front of the class, after 4 years, I was not really better, so dont feel bad, you can do it! Get a book, look at the one Jimiya recommended. I got a few books that really helped me out for those tough questions and I practiced. take little cards and wirite down possible questions and answers and study while in the car, tub or whereever, but it really helps to do it aloud. and if you have a friend that can help you.

A few years ago, I had the worst interview of my life, It was a panel interview for a pharmcuetical co. there were 12 people sitting across from me including the president!. This was for a customer service supervisor position, Well they said we are going to do a mock complaint to see how you would handle it, so we will give you a few moments to think how you would handle the situation. So I wnet back to the room, and this one woman pretended to be an old lady and starting screaming at me why her presciption wanst ready.

I just cracked up and started laughing so hard


"I am a school nerd. I get excellent grades (my saving grace in all of this), graduated magna cum laude, etc"

really play this up, you are in accounting, and it seems they alwasy aks what are your weakness, just sya one, but you always put a positive spin on it.

with your credentials, you should have businesses lining up to hire you

good luck
take a deep breath and relax, and try some deep breathing exercises, and pictuer somehting happy. that is waht I did last week when I had to fly for my trip and was totally freaking out

honeybear

 

That book I recommended talked about this. You choose something ahead of time for your weakness that is actually a good thing - something like, "I tend to be a perfectionist so sometimes it is difficult for me to call a project done because I just keep working on it to make it better." Or something like that.

My dad used this same book when he was interviewing a few years back. He had a scary panel interview as well. Then one guy took him to lunch and showed him around the facilities. As the book suggested, he made "small talk" that was actually enhancing his application. Like when the guy showed him the company's gym, my dad mentioned how he works out every morning on the treadmill and weights in their basement (shows he is conscious about his health). That sort of thing. He got the job.

Or in my interview - they asked if I am more of a team player or a loner. I said that I enjoy working on a team because the different strengths of individuals can combine to make a much better product. But I also enjoy working alone and challenging my limits and I love learning new things. I interviewed in front of the entire department (about 12 people) and my boss told me after I was hired that it was the first time ever that the vote was unanimous on who to hire.

The book tells you everything you need to know about how to handle yourself and turn the questions in your favor. It even shows you how to answer "Tell me a little about yourself." I didn't do every exercise, but I did write down some key information and memorized my answer to "Tell me about yourself" (which they didn't ask!!). And I read the book cover to cover because it put me in the correct mindset so that I could automatically think of the right way to turn any question around, even if it wasn't covered in the book.

 

I used to be the same way. Only it extended to talking with people on the phone. Well I was out of work for like 6months and a dispatching position came open. Honestly I only applied to meet my quota for my unempolyment bennifits cause I was a little short that week. Well suprisingly I got an interview and the job. I was horrified not only did I have to talk to people on the phone but on the radio and 911. The first few days were downright scary but you know what I love it. I could do this in my sleep now. Although I cant give you any great advice on how to overcome your fears I can tell you it can be done. I did and I am a wuss! Looking back I am so glad this came along not only did it save us finacially but I found something I love doing and plan on for many more years. So good luck girl and I know you can do it.

PS My interview was horrible, I rambled and was so nervous I was shaking during most of it but I guess they saw something in me just like I know they will see something in you!

 

Thanks for all the advice. I went to booksamillion and bought that book. Also another one by the same guy. I'm a little bit calmed down now. The panic is now coming in waves.

I think if I can make it through the "Tell me about yourself" question I should be OK. Lol. I hate that question.

 

"I think if I can make it through the "Tell me about yourself" question I should be OK. Lol. I hate that question."

let see I am really a wanted serial killer :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

good luck!!!

honeybear