Some Funny True Stories to Brighten Your Day

Idiots at Work:
I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had not signed the back of my card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why she said she had to compare the signatures. So I signed the credit card in front of her. She then carefully compared the signatures and as luck would have it, they matched.

Idiots in the Neighborhood:

I live in a small rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "too many deer were being hit by cars and he didn't want them to cross there anymore."

Idiot Sighting:

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with a co-worker of mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?"


Idiot Sighting:

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked inside it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey, I announced to the technician, "It's open!" To which he replied, "I know - I already got that side."

 

rofl thank you..

 

hahahahaha they're great :lol:

 

=D> To funny!

 

OMG that was too funny!!! I like the deer crossing and the keys locked in the car!!! It's hard to think that there really are that many idiots out in this world!!

 

Not hard for me at all. I keep thinking I want to move somewhere really remote so I don't have to deal with them anymore. I used to be amazed every day at how dumb so many people are - now I just sigh and accept it as fact.


Jamiya

 

Oh god i know there are I see them all the time!! I was driving down the street a couple days ago and this couple with 2 small children just walk right out in front of me like I wasn't even there! They get mad cause I had to slam on my breaks and honked my horn at them. They had the nerve (sp) to tell me I scared their children!! Now I don't have a small little car, my car weights in at a little over 5,000 LBS it's not easy to stop something that big going 55. Thanks to idiots I now need new tires!

 

One day when I was driving to the Bark Park, I made a mistake. I was thinking that the right turn lane off the highway was a new lane (like the one near my house) so I didn't look very carefully before turning. It was totally my fault.

But the idiot that was already in the lane leaned on his horn (a good response) and ACCELERATED, I am assuming because he was in the right and I was in the wrong?? If he had hit me, would that have made him feel better, knowing he was right? Luckily the lane was big and I got out of the way on the shoulder. But couldn't he have BRAKED just in case? It seems to me that would have been the smart thing to do, rather than accelerating.

I also hate it when people drive for miles and miles on the highway directly in your blind spot. Then if you don't see them and move over right in front of them, they give you the finger. I think it's very smart to make rude gestures at people who make mistakes that were in effect caused by you. Good policy, there. :roll:


Jamiya

 

Lol, dats jokes!

 

#-o Jamiya, I think the kind of guys you mentioned, (and God knows how many of them I stumble on every day here in deep Redneckland), may not mecessarily be idiots. They may be thinking they outsmart you into fixing their run down cars for free - it was your fault, you got insurance - they get their cars fixed for free kind of logic!!! God be praised, my reflexes are good enough to keep from fixing anybody's car at my expense!!!!

 

I have a friend at work whose car was totalled by an idiot who ran a red light while talking on his cell phone and has no insurance. Now THAT is a mess. :x


Jamiya

 

How about when you call an office and say your name and why you are calling and the receptionist asks who you are and want you want! I HATE that!

 

lol... :0023:

 

I e-mailed a software company to find out my license ID because my e-mail crashed and I lost it. They told me they'd e-mail it to me. I didn't get it. I asked again. They said they would e-mail it. I didn't get it. Finally I told them again and confirmed they were using the correct e-mail account. They asked me for my license ID to confirm it was really me.....ugh.

Then there was the tech support guy for Replay TV. I was having a problem and had already called once and got a case # assigned. I talked to someone else later and what they told me to do made it worse. So I called back and gave him the case number. Then he asked me if it was the first time I had called. I asked him how I would have a case # if I had not called before. He was silent.


Jamiya

 

Like, when you call the phone company from your cell phone because you are having problems with your home phone, and you tell them that you are calling from a cell phone and the lady tells you that she will have to call me at the house to confirm that it is me as my husbands name is the main name on the acct..... call the phone in the house that does not work? Go right ahead "Brainiac from Smart Tron 5"!

 

I was in a accident a few years ago where a lady ran a stop sign and hit me doing around 40. Totalled my car, but I was at fault casue i was the one who "failed to yield"? But she ran the stop sign. It was a 4 way stop, I stopped me assuming she was going to also I went, well little did I know that she wasn't going to! I had to go to court the judge laughed and sent me on my way. But because the ticket said it was my fault I had to pay for her damages! Talk about one stpid police officer! Thanks to him my Ins. is out of this world!

 

I work at a bingo centre a couple of days a week. Once, one of the callers was sitting at her seat getting ready to start calling. She has a microphone and was talking to the crowd about the new mobile phone she had. Someone else had to show her how to silence it for the game. They showed her the vibrating effect the phone has. Then she says into the microphone..."Oooh, this would be good for deaf people.." There was a small pause before the whole room burst into laughter.
Now it's ok saying something dumb every now and then... but in front of a couple of hundred people?!!