tension rising between everyone over pepe

well i am honestly at the end of my rope with pepe. i just dont know what to do with him. he has so many hehavioural problems. sometimes i just dont think he is right in the head and that he was born this way. im really really angry at him at this moment, i dont even want to look at him. i can handle him directing his naughtiness on us but, hes always bullying pheobe and the other night he was really rough with her. he pounced on her, pinned her down and bit her repeatedly. pheobe was crying and screaming. i yelled and hissed at him but he would not get off until i stormed over towards him. pheobe ran off to hide and she wouldnt come out. she was very scared and skittish. she finally came back out after a while only for pepe to do the same thing again!!! she hardly ever comes out to the family room anymore because pepe is there. she has also pooped in my clothes and has started to adopt bad behaviours of her own, which im pretty damn sure has got to do with pepe. i just dont know what to do. ive tried everything and ive come to the conclusion that this is just him, his personality, and i will never be able to change that. we make sure he knows hes hurting everyone when he attacks, but he just doesnt seem to care, its like he enjoys hurting everyone and he doesnt associate punishment with his biting and scrathing! the only thing i can think of is to let him outside so he can use up all of that predatory instinct and tire himself out. but if i did this id be afraid that hed beat up everyone elses cats and id end up paying the neighbourhoods vet bills. i want my old pheobe back, the one who would hang out with you wherever you walked and would do silly things to get your attention. pheobes my first real pet, and if pepe is going to turn her into a scared lonely little cat then i will have no choice but to send him away. :x i dont understand how pepe turned out to be so crazy. the day i bought him home he was like that, even the day i viewed him he was pretty naughty and was also disrespectful to his littermate, mum and relatives. i thought this was just kitten behaviour but it was never to be. whoever said maine coons are gentle giants is a big fat liar.

 

Some cats, no matter the breed, adapt well to multiple cat homes and some just don't. It sounds to me like Pepe is a solo artist and won't adapt/share a home with other cats.

I don't have any advice for you on that because in my experience, there is nothing you can really do about it other than to find him a home where he is the only cat.

Sorry....I hope someone else here has some advice to offer....but I personally don't think you can change his Alpha behavior.

 

I'm so sorry I agree with Cassie, it seems like he is a loner. I don't have any advice, but until you figure out what to do, maybe you can keep Pepe and Pheobe in separate rooms at night? For Pheobes sake?

Good luck!

 

I'm really sorry you're going through this Kyles. Poor Pheobe. I know how it feels to see your baby unhappy. Can you give Pepe some daily "time outs" so Pheobe can spend some quality time with you everyday without having to watch her back?

Good luck with whatever you decide to do. No one here will fault you on your decision.

 

so sad to read all this... i can understand you frustration, and i agree with what everyones said.

If he's that aggressive, perhaps he should find other acomodations.

i had a cat once who was really bad.. i put up with it for a year, him attacking my dog, and my friends and i without warning or provication, he was forever destroying things and up on the counter IN things.. it was a stressful year.

His mom was feral.. i kinda shoulda expected it, but in the end he found a better home with oher people.

Do what u think is best hun. we'll support ya.

 

I'm really sorry kyles. I can imagine how frustrated you must be. Have you discussed this with your vet? (sorry if you've said previously, I can't remember). There are meds for cats with behavioral problems however, I would only consider these as a last resort. It could be that he just has an extremely strong prey drive and way too much pent up energy... :?
Would it be possible for you (or someone you know) to build him an outdoor cat enclosure? Maybe something like that would help keep him occupied enough to leave Pheobe alone.

 

I'm so sorry about your predicament, kyles. I agree with the other posters that some cats just don't get along.

Although Socks and Mittens grew up together and are fine with each other, I introduced another cat named Scooter that belonged to a family member who couldn't keep him and Socks would not accept him at all and made his staying here a living hell. Fortunately we were able to find another home for Scooter and he is very happy now.

We tried another adult cat one other time when we had only one kitty and the new kitty was so agressive toward our kitty that he kept hiding under the covers on our bed. That time we had to take the new kitty back to the humane society. Our kitty was here first and it wasn't fair to him.

My only suggestion is maybe to find a new home for whichever kitty is the newer one. Did you have pepe first. How long have you had pheobe?

Whetever you decide. Best of luck.

 

bente - seperate rooms at night might be a good idea. pepe is always on the bench at night, knocking everything he can get his hands on onto the floor.

halaroo - i dont think timeouts would be good for pepe. it would probably make his boredom even worse trying to catch him once hes done something bad is impossible too, id probably end up sticking myself in timeout after 10 mins of chasing him :lol:

nern - we havent discussed this with the vet yet. im going to ring them up and talk to them about him going outside etc. if do decide to go down that route i will need to get his outdoor vaccinations. i dont think tablets would work because as you say its just a strong prey drive. i also dont want to give him tablets everyday, it takes 1 hour just to give him a worming tablet! :lol: dad has thought about making an enclosure but it wouldnt be possible in the house i am at right now. he also likes to run alot and an enclosure wouldnt satisfy that.

sunset - pheobe was here first. ive had her for 3 years.

argh im in such a mess. i think i will trial letting him out for the day. there are dogs on 2 sides of us so he wont go in their yard. for the 3rd side i might talk to the house owners and give them a spray bottle so if they catch pepe somewhere they dont want him they can squirt him. i use to let him out when he was younger and he caused no problems with other cats [he just followed pheobe around] and he never went into the front yard. what do you all think about that idea?

 

kyles...try feliway...sometimes it helps with aggression, and its natural. do they have it down there? i would get the kind that you plug into your outlet....and have one in each room if you can. maybe that would help... :0011:

 

i tried that a while back. lets just say the diffuser is collecting dust now :lol:

 

Is Pepe trustworthy to be let out? Does he steer away from people and cars? Milo has to be let out by my hubby every spring, summer, and fall for a few hours each day. I don't agree with letting him out, but he's a much happier kitty after being let out. He'll leave our furniture alone and won't take out his fustrations on our other kitties as much. Some cats just need to roam the neighborhood just to stay happy and satisfied. Can you walk Pepe on a leash and harness? :0011:

 

when we use to let both him and pheobe out he never caused any trouble. they stayed away from the front yard where the main road is. they would always hang out next door [the one with no dogs] and explore their backyard. i dont think they mind because their yards a mess and they are never out there. only problem is there are 2 cats that come into our yard sometimes. i havent seen them back in a long time but im worried pepe might beat them up. i doubt he would because hes not the type to go bounding up to strange cats, but you never know. ive tried a leash before and that didnt work out, he would try and run away from the leash :lol: :lol: