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Tricky situation...Need advice?

Discussion in 'Dogs - all breeds / types' started by gwen13, Jan 29, 2005.

  1. gwen13

    gwen13 New Member

    Ok guys..this is the second time this has happened and it really makes me so worried! :cry: I almost cried today over it I was so upset.
    I live with my dad (no no I'm not a mooch, I'm young, still in school) and we recently moved in my grandparents so we can help them out and like cook for them and take care of them.

    They've been here a few months now and are very old fashioned and believe dogs shouldn't be in the house, so unlike before when we left my husky inside all day while my dad worked and I went to school, they go and put her outside! I tell them to leave her in my room because thats what we normally did (she loves it) but they won't listen to me.

    Thats one thing that bothered me, but now today for the second time my grandma left the gate open!! :(
    I came home from school to see my girl running down the street with her ears down looking miserable and soaking wet from the rain! Here in LA drivers are horrible and especially when it's raining and we live near 2 very very busy intersections near my school. I get so scared even thinking about losing her, but she could have gotten hit by a car! Or even lost or who knows what could have happened to her.
    Most people that lose their dogs in the city never get them back and this is the 2nd time she's gotten out because they have just left the gates open.

    I try to talk to them about remembering to make sure they close the gate but they just won't take it seriously. They seem to think it's no big deal and my grandpa will even say in a happy joking tone "Oh she just went looking for you!" and will laugh.
    I try to tell them she could have gotten hit by a car or been injured or lost and they just tell me just wants to explore the neighborhood. Or worse, they tell me, "you should have trained her not to leave the yard!" :x I'm really upset but I can't yell at them or anything like that, they're my grandparents and I love them but they don't seem to get the message! :?

    Please help, I'm all out of ideas!
  2. someday

    someday New Member

    Wow...that is a tricky situation...I would have thought explaining to them why you would like her left in, or at the very least in the backyard would have done it...unfortunately..since that wouldn't work...you must take steps to protect her...Would they maybe listen to your dad better? Sometimes people are just stuborn like that..if not..I would recommend getting a lock for your bedroom or for the gate on the yard...Preferably the gate..locking dogs in a house that only one person has access to makes me nervous...god forbid there be a fire or some other sort of emergency..You could also invest in an invisable fence...these do take training though before they can be effective..
  3. honeybears

    honeybears New Member

    gwen, your grandparents sound like they come from the old school (in my opinion) that dogs are dogs and should be outside etc.

    And you have grown up differently with your dogs being a member of your family and a big part of you I would first discuss with your dad how this is just upsetting this is to you and can he help with your them and sit down and talk with your grandparents how finding her out running around, that she is going to get hit, she has never been an outdoor dog, that she is your BEST FRIEND and how devestated you would be if you lost her, I really hope your dad can also help with this.

  4. honeybears

    honeybears New Member

    I think maybe Someday has a point, YOur dad has to know how upset you and what it would do to you emotionionaly if you lost hee and maybe he will let you have a lock on your room while you are gone and you can leave her locked in your room

    This is so hard, because they shoudlnt be going in your room in the first place and letting her out. You can tell your dad you feel you dont have privacy anymore either How old are you?

    Its hard for me because I am not a parent, How old are you?? that would help better with some advice

  5. Aqueous

    Aqueous New Member

    Thats a very tricky and potentially dangerous situation for your poor baby.

    It reminds me of when we had Max and my grandmother and uncle moved in with us.

    I agree with the lock on the gate. When we had Max the gate was always being left open (either by my grandmother or the guy that reads the meter) until my dad put a lock on the gate. Only he had the key so there was no way it would be left open by accident.

    My dad also set rules with them like only putting him out when we were home and leaving him in the laundry room when we weren't.
  6. nern

    nern New Member

    I'm so sorry gwen...how frustrating. Maybe your dad can have a talk with them and let them know how seriously upset you are getting over this. If not, maybe you can get a lock for the door to your room and just lock the dog in when you leave for school. I really hope you can find a solution.
  7. coppersmom

    coppersmom New Member

    Oh Gwen! I feel so bad for you! My stomach knotted up just reading your post. A husky is usually hard enough to contain--let alone an open gate! :cry:

    I like the idea of a lock on the gate. My parents had to do that because my Dad would not properly latch their gate and it would blow open. After he saw us crying when Sioux-Zee got out--he now bungees it. He is old school too an just tolerates the dogs inside. But now we think he "gets"it.

    Good Luck! I'm thinking about you!
  8. Jamiya

    Jamiya New Member

    How are thngs going, Gwen? Did you have a talk with your dad or grandparents yet?

    It can be very difficult to make grandparents understand. They sometimes don't get the world that we live in now. Perhaps if you or your dad use language like, "When you were my age it was fine to let a dog run loose. But things have changed now. There's more traffic and she could be killed. And there are people who steal dogs to sell them to testing facilities where horrible things are done to them. Huskies are beautiful dogs and at a very great danger of being stolen. Please, respect my privacy and leave her in my room."

    Or something like that....
  9. Shineillusion

    Shineillusion New Member

    Gwen, it sounds like you're between a rock and a hard place. Not only can we be stubborn and set in our ways, those of us past a certain age can get mighty forgetful at times, too. And the older we get, the more we forget what it was we agreed not to forget.

    Talk to your dad about the possibility of putting some sort of spring on the gate that will automatically close it, so it can't be left open. You'll also need a latch that will engage on it's own. That way you're dog will at least be safely contained in your yard while you're away.
  10. Jamiya

    Jamiya New Member

    Wait! You have a chi, too! Where does the little one stay when you are gone? They don't think the little guy should be outside, do they?!
  11. gwen13

    gwen13 New Member

    Thank you everyone so much for your advice!! :eek:
    It really means a lot to me that so many people here can understand be so supportive and helpful when I really needed it, thank you guys a lot. I convinced my dad to have a talk with them because they, as you can tell, are sometimes too old fashioned and disregard anything that comes from me or anyone my age. My baby isn't getting left in the house all day, yet, and like someone else mentioned it worries me to have her in a locked room just in case of an emergency or anything.

    They have gotten better though and said they'll try to remember to check the gate before they do put her inside. My grandma kept sticking her outside because she said the dog would make a mess in my room :roll:
    I explained to her that she is potty trained and hasn't made a mess in the house in 4 years since the day we first got her (she ran to the door but we didn't realize what she was doing because we had just gotten her that day so she peed in the entryway :lol: We know now, and she's never done it since!) Plus she is really good about holding herself, I don't know if it's normal or not but during the summers when I would sleep in, she wouldn't come wake me up to take her out or anything she'd just sleep until I woke her up to take her out, for 8 hours or more. So surely if she can last through nights and mornings, she's fine for the 4 hours that I'm at school! And I let her out before I leave so I know it's not an issue, I just have to convince my grandma.

    As for the self latching gate or a lock for the gate, that sounds like a great idea! =D Our fence towards the front of the house is made out of really heavy iron though so I'm not sure how a self-latching gate would work but surely a lock could easily be put on. The 2 other gates are wood though so I'm sure those could be set up to make sure they close automatically. The latch goes down if you close it but the door itself doesn't close on it's own. I'll see if we can get that done and I can put my mind at ease!

    & Jamiya, yes, I have my chi, but thankfully they leave him alone at all times! He has a little play pen set up in one of the extra bedrooms (because my husky is the oldest so she gets her favorite room, which is mine, so my chi gets the other room while I am gone) It is really unfair how they have a double standard for the 2 dogs but sometimes I think they forget about my chi even existing because he's so little! They always tell me that he's not a dog, like he's just some sort of fluffy rodent, I guess little foofy dogs weren't very cool back in the day :lol:

    [edit] oops trying to make sure I cover everything is hard, so honeybears, I'm a senior in high school, 4 more months until graduation! :y_the_best:
  12. honeybears

    honeybears New Member

    Gwen, glad to hear everything is working out. you just need to keep ingraining in them she is your baby, and nothing will happen in the house LOL about your CHi being a rodent,

    My dogs can go 12 hours or more without going, and I have a dog door, but if its raining i drag them out they still wont go. so I figue they will go when they need to. and they have never had accidents

  13. Jamiya

    Jamiya New Member

    Once when I was out of town my husband slept in on a Saturday until after noon (which is not unusual for him) and DID NOT LET THE DOGS OUT!! They sleep in crates in our room and apparently they just laid there morosely waiting for him to wake up. They are very good about not asking to get out, although I have never left them in that long myself.

    And I know what you mean about the chi. I love the little fellows, but my husband sees a little dog like that and gets this look on his face that's the funniest thing - like, "What the heck is that thing, why does it exist, and why in the world would anyone want one..." A lot of men get that same look when looking at a chi, mini poodle, pomeranian, etc. I think it's hysterical.

    I have a friend who has a Pom. He works with my husband and it's his wife's dog. Every time I go over there, the little guy runs up to me and I pick him up and he ends up sitting in my lap all day. I get "that look" every time, LOL.

    I'm glad it sounds like things are working out. I love how grandparents think they have to take care of you - like trying to make sure your room doesn't get messy - and they think they are helping. I'm 35 years old and my grandparents still think I will burn myself if I use the oven. :lol:
  14. coppersmom

    coppersmom New Member

    Good news Gwen! I hope that everything goes well.

    Makes me miss my grandparents though... :cry:

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